TITA; Things That Annoy Me - Part One

This may take some time to type, but it'll be fun for me nonetheless. Once you've read through it, feel free to add your own in the comments section, or even comment on some of the choices I have made.

This is going to be a big long list I feel

• People who make 'celebs' feel guilty about not following back on Twitter. They don't want to see the crap you talk about folks
• People who ask 'celebs' to retweet random crap and having a go at those who refuse. Let them have a life
• People who post every little thing that is going on in some reality TV shite. The people who care will be watching it anyway.
• Reality TV shite
• People who are so sad and up their own arses that they feel the need to actively complain to OFCOM about a celebrity who has offended a category of person that they don't even come under (white people claiming racism against others for example)
• People who complain about stuff they see on TV. Does your remote not allow you to watch stuff you're not going to like?
• The fucking beige brigade who feel they have a right to have a go at you about anything and everything. Fuck off you uptight bastards and let us enjoy life without having to wear safety goggles.
• Cyclists who flout the rules of the road, making us law abiding cyclists look bad and face the consequences of your actions
• Motorists who speed up when seeing an amber traffic light, so they get home 20 seconds quicker
• Motorists who choose to ignore red lights at pedestrian crossings
• Pedestrians who press the button on a crossing before even looking up to see if there is anything coming (yes, that means you Mother)
• Motorists who choose to ignore zebra crossings because they thing the law doesn't apply to them
• Students who go out on the lash on a Saturday, moan they are skint on a Sunday and protest about the high cost of student loans on a Monday
• Students who feel they know something about everything and have a right to spout of their opinions on things they know nothing about
• Students
• Students
• Useless and unneeded university degrees which drive up the cost of universities when they could be done just as easily and much cheaper in local colleges without given the little scrotes free money which they then moan about because they feel they 'deserve' more. You deserve sod all you freeloading tossers. Get a job and pay for your own education like my sister was forced to do
• Newspapers who sensationalise everything
• News and media companies who feel 'celeb' gossip is newsworthy
• People who have never smoked in their lives who tell you "just to quit". Noooooo, really? Fuck a duck, never thought about doing that, it's so easy now you've brought it up, I'll quit cold turkey, straight away.
• People who have smoked in their lives who then do the same thing. You bastards know how difficult it is, so don't come all high and mighty now you've given up
• People who can't go more than a couple of hours without a cigarette and have to light up in a place where smoking is banned (although smoking is addictive, it's not that sodding addictive)
• People who have no sense of awareness while out shopping, stopping and walking in front of you
• Children who can't behave in public
• Parents of children who can't behave in public to next to fuck all to get them to stop. Whack the little prick around the ahead, which will 1) Shut them up and 2) Entertain us at the same time
• The beige brigade who decided it was wrong to smack your kids when they were being little pricks
• Young folk who think the rest of the world wants to listen to their music collection on their phone. Use earphones
• People who feel that drinking alcohol gives them a licence to have a fight
• People who use alcohol as an excuse for fucking up. I still know what I'm doing when I'm drunk, I just choose to ignore my morals. I certainly don't blame the alcohol for it though
• Women who bitch and moan about how their high heels are hurting their feet. They did the same fucking thing the last 30 times you've worn them, you should have cottoned on to the pattern by now
• Women who say all men are arseholes. No they aren't, just the men you choose are arseholes. Change the quality of man you associate with and you'll be treated better
• Mary Whitehouse type lesbian feminists who think all men are sexist and not understanding the irony of that though
• Mary Whitehouse type lesbian feminists who have made it impossible for good fathers to have decent access to their own children
• Mary Whitehouse type lesbian feminists who proclaim to hate men, yet do their upmost to look as masculine as they can
• Women who deny they masturbate
• Women who are always in a bad mood and say they don't masturbate (try it and cheer the fuck up)
• Women who blame men when they are on their periods and blame men when they aren't
• Women who think it's the man's job to provide protection against pregnancy and STI's
• Women who have their tits hanging out and then moan when men look at them

I fear I should steer away from the anti-women rants now, otherwise I won't get this finished by midnight

• The driving licence system which means people with no common sense and little intelligence are allowed behind the wheel of a deadly weapon
• The beige brigade who made it impossible to give the death penalty to murderers, rapists and paedophiles
• People who won't allow you to have your own opinion or belief because it doesn't fall in line with theirs
• Religious nuts (barring my lovely family, who I tolerate because I love them so much, the rest of you can fuck off though)
• People who force you to apologise for speaking the truth (Santa isn't real, you're the one lying to your children, don't give me a lesson on morality you hypocritical piece of shit)
• People who go to see Frankie Boyle or Billy Connolly and then complain because he was offensive
• People who don't have the mental capacity to turn their phones off in inappropriate places
• People who don't have the mental capacity to shut the fuck up once you've been well and truly owned in an argument

Right folks, that's your lot for part one. Part two will be along in the next few days